It’s been 440 days since I wrote a blog post. Written like that it seems so much longer than to just say “last April”.
I’ve done a lot in that time–most notably complete a graduate degree. A crazy, trying, and rewarding, jam-packed, twelve months that left no time to write for pleasure (much less introspection or self-actualization). I thought often of this blog though. I come back to it constantly (even in it’s inactive state) as one of the biggest joys and possibilities in my life. Likely not this blog specifically so much as writing, creating space, being authentic, finding footing on a platform (but, please God, not one of those platforms so many spew from), and perhaps above all leaving a trail.
I so love the process of checking in with self and others via the written word. In a more formal, free, and permanent fashion than a social media status. I love to look back occasionally and recall, relive, realize and recognize. Even more than that, I find much comfort in the idea that my thoughts, my process, my life exists somewhere outside myself, both stuck in a moment and progressing through the years.
There is much settling to be done in my life over the upcoming months. I feel like I legit missed a year of my girls’ lives and my marriage began to more closely resemble and series of co-parenting business transactions. The deficits in connection are real. Not to mention the more mundane things that matter little in the grand scheme but are necessary evils to daily living: organization, cleanliness, maintenance.
I guess what I’m saying is, more to come. Four hundred and forty days worth. And a lifetime beyond that…